Monday, May 10, 2010

has love come and gone?

it's my 12th day in las vegas...my last day with my "boyfriend". most of my stuff has been packed or getting ready to be packed in my 2 suitcases and backpack. the whole time i was packing though, my "boyfriend" would rather spend the last remaining hours of my stay watching tv with friends that he will still see...almost everyday if he wanted to.

i hope i won't feel like i've just wasted my time flying here, spending all my miles, spending all my time and energy and pouring love to someone who clearly may have fallen out of love already. or maybe he was not in love at all? infatuation? maybe. such a dangerous thing to confuse with love. every stakeholder gets affected.

*sigh* i wonder if i really am just over thinking everything. i wonder what i should do when i come back home. should i even make an effort anymore or wait for him to come to me? maybe the latter. but whenever he does, i'll make sure that he feels i still love him. this will be my last ditch attempt to rescue a relationship that i have thought all this time was really there.

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