Friday, May 14, 2010

an apology made out of love

even though our relationship has ended, i would hate for us to be mad at each other forever. i'm not mad anymore. i'm more disappointed that it didn't turn out the way i hoped it would. it's not the right time for me i guess, and maybe he's not the right person.

"mr D,


i just want to apologize for everything...i would hate to end us on a bad note.

i admit that my biggest mistake is having even the tiniest expectations. i realize it now and it's what you've been telling me all along but i'm just too stubborn, hard-headed and proud to admit it.

i still love u with all my heart, and that will never change. maybe this time is just not our time. i hope that someday when we see each other, we'll be okay. i don't want there to be any awkwardness on either of us.

i wish both of us the best of luck in whatever we do from this point forward. God Bless you and i love you.

jake"

it breaks my heart to say i love you to mr D because i know that i do mean it. i really, really want him back but if we are not getting along, i don't want to force it either. if he tries to come back to me, i'm still at a crossroads of what i'm gonna do when that time comes. can i promise to really not have any expectations at all? if i can't answer that question now, it's probably best to leave it the way it is now...for both of our sakes.

*listening to "Someday" by Rob Thomas

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