feels like i'm summer

times like these, i feel like i'm summer, from the movie 500 days of summer. she's this character who loved only 2 things -- her long black hair, and how she can cut it off without flinching. for me, that meant that when she loves something/someone, she can cut it/him/her off without feeling much of a remorse.

i've ranted that i felt crappy this and that about what happened between mr D and myself. but now, i feel like i can go on talking to him again. not exactly like before, but as friends. no expectations that things will turn out for the better, but just hoping it will. he's back to his messaging ways, and i'm back to my ways. the only thing that's definitely missing are those little sweet things he used to say. i really couldn't care less if i get those sweet messages or not. i'd rather not. it's better this way. if things turn out great, then...GREAT! if not, i don't get hurt as much.

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ugh...i gave mr D one of the titles of my blog entries. i forgot how easy it is to search for something on google, especially since those were the exact words of my title. i changed the title already, but i guess it won't be replaced on google until a few days later. when my entries came up, it said that it's as shown on feb 9th. that was a week ago. ugh...yet again.

i made him promise not to search for it since these entries are my innermost thoughts, and i'd be uncomfortable if i'm aware someone i know is reading it (except my philippines guy who i started this blog for in the first place). i hope he keeps his promise.

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we played vball again today (or yesterday i should say), our usual recreational practice before our thursday game. as usual too, some of the people in my team will always have something to say whenever i miss the ball. it's not like they get the ball all the time. i just have to rant about this one coz this is vball players' sickness. they always see other people's mistakes but not theirs. i just let it go in the court. vball is fun for me, but i'm not gonna risk injury by chasing after the ball when i know i can't get it. i don't mind getting constructive criticism. i would just rather take it from people who know they're not as perfect either.